Chapter 21
November 14, 2009 | Filed Under Lisa | Leave a Coment
Lisa walked quickly, pushing her stroller down the broken bumpy sidewalk. She didn’t know if her stomach was doing flip flops because of the pregnancy or in anticipation of seeing Thomas. The meeting with the separation counselor was in 10 minutes. If Dawn hadn’t convinced her that these formalities were good for her “divorce court image” she wouldn’t have agreed to go at all.
Separation counseling. In a perfect world she would be wandering the aisles of her local baby boutique with images of pink and blue floating through her mind, not deciding the fate of her marriage.
Grace let out a shriek as her multi-colored blanket got caught in the stroller gears and was yanked from her hand. Lisa quickly pulled the lovey free and handed it back to her daughter. As she rose she saw Thomas in the office building parking lot. She would have thought the woman he was speaking to was the counselor, as she’d never met her before, but the distance they were standing from each other was too close for to be just business.
Lisa began to take a slow step forward but stopped when she saw her kiss Thomas on the cheek. She blinked. Did she just see that? She gripped the stroller handles tightly as if they the only thing anchoring her to the ground.
Thomas stood expressionless with his hands in his suit pocket as the woman walked away, entered a car and left. It was only when the car passed right by where Lisa and Grace were standing that he noticed them. He look startled.
“That was…” he began as he walked briskly over to his family.
Lisa pushed past him and made her way into the building. “Don’t worry about it. Let’s get this over with.”
Below her cool tone were a plethora of questions: Was that the woman? Was he staying with her? Was he in love with her?
The elevator ride up to the third floor felt painfully long. Grace was now happily squiring in her father’s arms. Lisa struggled to integrate her husband’s cheating partner and loving father personas. It amazed her how two seemingly opposite words, cheating and loving, could coexist within one human being. Kind of like pregnant and alone.
Before long the family was in the office of Dr. Rosen. Lisa tuned out while Thomas explained their situation to the licensed psychologist. Her attention drifted from the certificates on the wall, to the thin branches waving to her from outside the window, to the pretty pink hem on her navy blue skirt. Her mind did everything it could to convince her that she wasn’t there.
“Lisa? Lisa?” Dr. Rosen’s voice brought her back to the present moment.”And what is your intention for this session?”
Lisa ignored the question and turned to her husband. “Who was that?”
Thomas looked at Dr. Rosen and then back at his oddly calm wife. “Dr. Rosen asked you to state your intention for this counseling session.”
Grace sat on her father’s lap sucking on a teething biscuit. Wet, crumbling pieces of cracker fell to the carpet.
“Was that her?” Lisa crinkled her brow.
Dr. Rosen started to speak, “Before we get into any specifics I’d really like to-”
Lisa stood up. “This was a mistake. Counselors are for people committed to solving problems and moving forward. I’m not an idiot.” She turned to the doctor. “Thank you for your time.”
She started to scoop Gracie into her arms when she caught the scent of the damp crackers. The ordinary mundane smell stirred her almost-empty stomach. She felt the orange juice, the only thing she’d been able to “eat” that morning, begin to make an appearance.
Luckily the trash can was within reach.
The room was silent as Lisa came up for air.
Dr. Rosen began to rise slowly, “Are you okay? You’re obviously in distress.”
Lisa’s eyes avoided Thomas’ stare.
“No,” he said flatly, “She’s pregnant.”
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